After 'flu from hell, dislocating a knee, protracted wrangles with Chinese banks, and a spontaneous data wipe on my computer... today I managed to scald my testicles.
A cup (or two or three) of hot water is essential for lubricating the vocal cords when I'm recording teaching materials or whatever. And this morning one of the girls from the studio was fussing around trying to adjust my microphone when the boom suddenly collapsed, dropping the mike violently on to my little collection of paper cups and so unleashing a tsunami of steaming liquid across the table and into my lap.
Gentlemen in China are more than usually anxious about this sort of injury this week, after the recent news from the far southern province of Hainan of a man dying when a woman attacked him by squeezing his balls.
2 comments:
When my second Missus-to-Be and I were dating, we once stopped for takeout coffee at a McDonald's restaurant while headed back to our area of NJ from another. I never use drive-throughs (because of the hearing thing), so when I came out of the restaurant had the coffee in one hand. I unlocked the car door and sat in the bucket seat; this was an oooold Toyota Corolla, with no console and a manual transmission. I started up the car and -- still can't quite believe this -- put the coffee cup between my thighs as I endeavored to engage the clutch to shift the car into reverse...
That was the most creative cussing I ever did in my life, I think.
Oh, and this was a fairly warm summer evening, and the car had no air-conditioning. So the windows were down. The vehicle parked next to the Toyota was a mini-bus of children headed to or from a Bible camp.
Good times. In retrospect.
In your case, did the young lady in question try to, er, mop up?
The Von Trapp family always seem to be lurking inconveniently nearby for me, waiting to unleash their disapproval on my occasional indecorous outbursts. It's as if they're stalking me. Does that church bus follow you around? Are you sure?
Did you miss this one, a very silly comment on a careless capitalization error on a bar menu over at the other place that I really only posted because I thought it might tickle you.
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