Saturday, May 01, 2010

You can't make a 'hamburger' out of fish

Unless you're in China, of course.

Having foolishly overlooked supper during an evening of drinking and pool playing a couple of nights ago, I decided to take a chance on a microwaveable hamburger from my local 7/11. I've tried this brand a number of times in the past, and have found the burgers undistinguished but not too objectionable. However, they have several different colour-coded varieties, which say nothing on the packaging in English apart from 'Hamburger' - so, it's a bit like playing Russian Roulette.

I was a bit suspicious of the colour of my burger when I opened the packet, and gave it a cautious sniff. Well, it didn't look like fish. And it didn't smell of fish. I thought it was probably a chicken burger. After cooking, it was starting to smell slightly fishy - but only in that very faint way that you often get with chicken or pork, or sometimes even beef, that's been in the deep-freeze too long. I thought I was going to be OK.

No. It was indeed a fishburger. And I am fairly violently allergic to fish: one bite brought on a fit of dry heaves. Blech.

I really ought to know better.


The British Cowboy said...

Do you have Mosburger in mainland China? We were conned into going to one last time round in Taiwan, and it was a singularly unpleasant experience.

JES said...

The Food TV network here fairly often hosts a "best burger" competition, sponsored by and held on the premises of (of all things) a Napa Valley winery. They have two broad categories: beef burgers, and... everything else. That's where people try out odd fish combinations, vegan burgers, prosciutto burgers, and so on. Some of them actually look edible, even tasty; but, my God, watching the judges bite into a three- to four-inch-thick beef burger (counting the bun), as juices and toppings run down their chins and wrists -- I'll tell you, it's enough to make a carnivore out of anybody.

(See here. I just knew there had to be a separate site for it.)

Froog said...

Stop it, John, you're making me hungry.

No, Cowboy, I've never heard of Mosburger - is that a Taiwanese chain, I wonder?

We've just had a Fatburger open up here; though, frankly, I've found it rather disappointing - not a patch on Five Guys.

I just heard a rumour that a Burger King had opened somewhere in central Beijing (there's been one at the airport for a couple of years, but that's rather a long way to go just for a Whopper). The burgers in this town are so mediocre (and so overpriced) that this becomes indecently exciting news.

The British Cowboy said...

It's Japanese, but they are all over the renegade province. Nasty shit.

Then again, what do we expect from the country that brought us the Bataan Death March?

A local restaurant here does a wonderful lunch burger - 2/3 beef, 1/3 chorizo. Might have to see if I can interview someone to take them there soon.