Old school!

I have said that I find taxi drivers in Beijing to have been getting much better over the past few years.

But then.....

Yesterday I got one who epitomised all of the worst traits of Beijing taxi drivers that foreigners so love to complain of. It was not exactly a pleasant experience, but it did nevertheless prompt a fond little shiver of nostalgia for my early days here - when such ordeals were commonplace.

The interior of the cab was dusty and malodorous. Well, no, the cab driver was malodorous. Cab Driver No. 1772** had the kind of B.O. that could kill a horse.

The cab driver was chomping (on some kind of nut, I think) - open-mouthed, hugely NOISILY (I didn't dare to look, but it sounded as if slobber would be cascading over the chin).

To overcome this self-generated noise, the driver had the radio turned up full-blast.

The driver was also maintaining an almost continuous burble of heavily accented misanthropy, complaining about the behaviour of other drivers on the road, complaining about the price of fuel, complaining about the sullenly uncommunicative laowai in the passenger seat.

The driver's own road sense and car control skills left much to be desired.

The driver then changed tack rather, ditching the sour schizophrenic mumbling, and instead complimenting me extravagantly on my Chinese. Well, I think they were compliments. Highly inappropriate, since I hadn't said anything other than my destination (5 or 6 times) and, "I'm sorry, I don't speak Chinese."

Then, of course, the driver didn't have ANY change. Luckily I had a roll of one kuai notes on me.

Taxi driver No. 1772** is a woman. Incompetence, curmudgeonliness, and rustic manners are not the exclusive preserve of the male.