Sunday, May 13, 2007

PS: Putting a face to the name

My frequent references to my great, long-ago affair with 'The Evil One' have prompted a number of queries from my correspondents as to who she was, how we met, what she looked like, how she managed to cast such a spell over me.

Well, I did find this photograph of her on the Internet a while ago. I don't think she can object to my posting it here, since she remains veiled by my teasing nickname for her - and there is, I think, absolutely no chance at all that any of my blog's tiny readership could recognise or trace her from this.

Darn, is this really a recent photo? She hardly seems to have changed at all in 10 years. My heart lurches once again....


I did eventually succumb to an upsurge of moral qualm about having posted her picture here... a few years later, when it became apparent that websearch tools were starting to become rather adept at 'recognising' photos. This, I thought, might make it possible to identify her by doing a comparison search on the photo I'd used here. And I didn't want to run that risk.

Having her picture here was perhaps too taunting and torturing for me as well: more than a dozen years on, I'm still completely daffy about the damn woman.


10 comments:

Anonymous said...

"...a number of queries from my correspondents ..."

Really? why don't these people ever comment?

Hellow? are you out there? come join us in the comment box :)

Yes, it looks like she has quite delicate hands.

You appear to be completely and utterly in love with her... still.

Posting her picture online!!! I know internet protocol is constantly evolving, but... not sure I'd feel comfortable with this if I were her.

Anonymous said...

Hello Froog

I sadly agree with the other comment. In both points. I understand how one cannot get over someone even after 10 years. I have been on both sides! The unforgetable and the unforgetful. Not fun to be either.
I really hope you try to move on by (for beginners) stop focusing on her and no longer mentioning her. Just forget her. There are many beautiful hands and faces out there in this big big world.

Froog said...

Froog said...

Nah, I was only "in love" with her for a year or two afterwards. Just occasionally a (very) little bit wistful now.

As to whether she'd mind my posting the photo....

Well....

1) She isn't ever going to know, and what you don't know....

2) This photo is already on the Net, and thus common property - she must accept that she has no control over how many other people may reproduce it.

3) It is anonymous, so no-one can actually identify her from it.

4) Lots of us routinely post photos of people on the Internet. I have dozens of pictures of friends - including some girls that I've dated, or tried to date - on my Yahoo Photos page.

So, the questions are: a) Does it make any difference that this is on a blog, where photographs of people are not the norm, and thus it acquires a greater prominence; and b) Is the real issue not the photograph itself, but the fact that I have identified her as a former girlfriend?

Since self-torture on ethical matters is my No 1 hobby, I shall consider the matter further.

It does trouble me slightly that I feel my attitude might be different if I were a hugely successful blogger with an audience of thousands of strangers every day. The fact is that this forum is really just a 'private salon' - with just a couple of dozen regular readers who are all close friends of mine, and used to sharing my most intimate thoughts and my 'family snapshots'.

EARTHLING said...

have a look at my blog, it's new and half empty, but new stuff will come soon,
by the way, I was the anonymous commentator before, sorry I didn't leave my name. I just realised after I posted it

Froog said...

Oh, Earthling, you tease!

Your blog is 'invitation only', and you forgot to 'invite' me!!

EARTHLING said...

oh, sorry, I'm new to this blog and don't know how it works. I don't mind that everyone can see and read it. Do you know how I set it to be open to all?

Froog said...

Go to Settings (there's a button on the main 'Dashboard' page), and then the Permissions tab, and select 'Anybody' for "Who can read this blog?" Easy-peasy.

I don't know why "invite-only" is the default!

EARTHLING said...

Thanks, done. not much there, but you are welcome to have a look.

Anonymous said...

You always had a predilection for redheaded ladies, didn't you, sir? Is her ancestry Irish by any chance?

She is certainly a beauty, but I think it is a little impolite to be publishing her picture for the world at large to see.

Froog said...

Scottish on her father's side, I imagine. Maybe some Irish too. Certainly 'fiery' in temperament!

I think I probably do have some genetically-programmed weakness for that colouring. Although lately, I seem to be falling for blondes a lot. Perhaps that's just a reaction against the montony of Chinese hair ("Any colour you like, so long as it's black").