A Geordie joke

A Geordie goes to the hairdresser's and says, "Gi' us a perm."

The barber shoots him a funny look for a moment. Then he says, "Ah wandered, loonly as a clurd..."

Well, it was a new one on me.

[Apologies if the rendition of the dialect is not all it might be. I've never had a particularly good ear for accents and the like, and have proven remarkably immune to picking them up myself. When I was doing my teacher training up in the north-east, I slowly learned to interpret the baffling local lingo from Biffa Bacon and Sid the Sexist, two of the main characters in the adult comic Viz (a Geordie creation which had only recently been launched nationwide and was becoming a huge pop-culture phenomenon of the time). I fondly recall that one of my favourite pupils back then once teased me (in a delightful Geordie sing-song I won't even attempt to recreate with my spelling): "Ay, sir, you don't half talk posh." I honestly don't think it had ever occurred to me before. I suppose university is a predominantly middle-class environment, and, in the south of England, the majority of university students speak with a fairly neutral, 'Home Counties' sort of accent. I'd scarcely known any other way of speaking - until I went oop north to begin my teaching career.]